NERD ALERT!

Title of Harry Potter 7 revealed

From the "No Thanks" Department

3 things:

1) Pete Rose has come out in favor of Mark McGwire's Hall of Fame bid. He goes on to mention that he deserves to be in the HoF as well.

McGwire on phone soon after hearing about this: "hi Pete Rose? This is McGwire. SHUT the **** UP!! You're not helping!!"

I bet that when Big Mac looks at the life Rose has made for himself it scares the crap out of and/or depresses the hell out of him. Probably both:

"In the Dec. 16, 2005, file photo, Pete Rose sits at a table waiting to sign autographs at Caesars Palace in Las Vegas. Rose said Tuesday that both he and Mark McGwire belong in the Hall of Fame. (AP Photo/Isaac Brekken/file)"

2) Daryl Strawberry has stated that "Jeter must 'embrace' A-rod". I don't think I can add anything to make that any funnier, except maybe this bit straight from the straw's mouth: "He's a sensitive guy," Strawberry said. "He's only played in Seattle and Texas. It's not New York. It's a big difference. You don't get booed in Texas. You don't get booed in Seattle when you play there."

If there's one thing Straw knows, it's when a teammate needs a hug. Check out this awkward moment with a bewigged Joe Pepitone:

3) Lastly, the Iraqi army celebrated the handover of Najaf from US Army control by eating frogs and live rabbits. I guess they didn't have as good a year as the Turkish airport workers Irene wrote about the other day. Either that or they couldn't find a camel.

Sorry but I just had to include a photo of this one too:

Baby goes through L.A. airport x-ray

The morons at the TSA x-rayed a one-month old baby! The grandmother spoke no English, and was confused about the security measures. Somehow the baby ended up on the conveyor belt to be x-rayed, and wasn't noticed till the screener saw its skeleton on the screen. The baby was taken to the hospital to check if it was okay. Duh!

Poor Poor Britney

This girl needs help! When will her friends and family stage an intervention? She looks awful, and she's developed quite a horrid taste in fashion (yes, worse than before). At least she's started wearing underwear again.

A Christmas present bound to be fun for everyone

This is an instant classic -- a SNL digital short as funny as Lazy Sunday. Yes, that's Justin Timberlake in the video. Go to NBC, http://www.nbc.com/Saturday_Night_Live/videos/, to check out the video.

How would you celebrate a job well done? Sacrifice a camel!

This week maintenance workers for Turkish Airlines sacrificed a camel to celebrate a job well done. They all pitched in to buy the camel, and then sacrificed it at Istanbul's Ataturk airport. The camel was seen being led into the airport grounds, and workers were later seen holding up bloody pieces of meat after the sacrifice. Who knew that one camel can provide 1,540 pounds of meat? I'm sure the members of the European Union are just rolling their eyes on this news.

Jolie-Pitt Superbaby Revolution Redux

That Shiloh is sure cute! Angelina + Brad = perfect baby!

Feel free to reread Jim's theory on the superbaby revolution here.

Smart or Stoopid

Take a simple IQ test at http://www.flashbynight.com/test/ and see how you score. You can compare your score to others that have taken the test.

Germany real winner of World Cup: report

check out this article from yahoo today

The article talks about how Germany's image improved worldwide because of hosting the World Cup and made lots of Euro$ too, as their GDP growth was 3 times higher than last year's.

But for me this makes the article worth reading:

"Germans were no longer regarded as humorless beer drinkers who ate sausages in their lederhosen trousers. Now there was an image abroad of Germany as a modern, efficient and tolerant nation full of enthusiastic soccer fans."

ummm...yeah, sure, uh-huh. There wasn't any beer drinking done by Germans during the World Cup. nope. Just the Brits. they were the ones.

No more of this:

Here's Germany's new image:

see? no lederhosen here

Wii have a problem

It was only 6 weeks ago that I first ever heard of Nintendo's Wii. Now you can't watch TV without seeing its commercials featuring 2 Japanese guys who randomly show up and introduce the game system to unsuspecting people. Apparently Wii has been selling like hotcakes, and now people have begun posting problems they've had with it. Apparently the remote controllers for Wii tends to slip out of your hands and fly across the room and cause damage to television sets and furnitures. Check out the photo of the busted screen of a 48" TV. Bummer, man!

Zombie Chickens

I haven't completely made the switch to organic cage-free chicken and eggs. After reading an article about zombie chickens, I can't continue to support massive chicken farms and egg-laying factories. Chicken farms in Sonoma County, Northern California alone dispose more than 500,000 "spent" hens (meaning they no longer produce eggs). In the past these hens were processed for soups and canned meat. Processing plants stopped accepting them because it was deemed not cost effective. So now these farmers put tens of thousands of chickens into a sealed box and fill it with carbon monoxide to kill them. Eventually they become compost. The bad thing is that some chickens don't die. Locals near these chicken farms claim that they've found "zombie" chickens wandering on their properties.

Add Sparkles to your life

If you've never seen the show, How I Met Your Mother, you're missing a pretty funny show. You can't go wrong when the show stars Willow from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Doogie Howser, and Nick from Freaks and Geeks? It's on Mondays at 8. Last week was one of the funniest ones ever! Check out the myspace page for Robin Sparkles. Her song will be stuck in your head (and that's a good thing). Don't forget to watch the video too. Canadians rock!!!

More Amazing Race than ever

Amazing Race Asia premiered this week to blockbuster ratings in Asia. Similar to the original Amazing Race, teams of 2 persons race for a cash prize. Amazing Race Asia is limited to traveling around Asia, and the grand prize is only $100,000US. It'll be kind of interesting to see how this show unfolds with the diverse cast racing around Asia. The show is in English, but most of them are of Asian descent so they speak at least another language. Will they have problems with foreign languages? Will they have problems eating weird foods? Don't they already do?

Back in the land of ice cubes

Finally back home after visiting Berlin, Dresden, and Prague. Jim and I had a great time, but it was nice to sleep in our own bed after being away for nearly 2 weeks. Everytime we go away for a trip, it reminds us that Americans have it pretty good.

What do we miss when we're travelling?
1. Ice cubes - You rarely get any ice cubes when you order cold drinks. Jim got a soda at a McDonald's in Berlin, and there were probably 5 ice cubes in his "large" 16 oz. soda.
2. Free water at restaurants - Whenever you ask for water, they always ask "with gas" (carbonated water) or "no gas" (mineral water). This means that you're getting water, and they're charging you for it.
3. Double-ply toilet paper - Europeans must come to America and think they've gone to heaven when using our toilet paper -- once they get over the shock of seeing bulk toilet paper available in packs of 24 double rolls.
4. Paper or plastic? - There's no option in Europe. It's assumed that you have your own bags when shopping at the grocery store. They just ring up your stuff and shove it down the belt. You need to ask for a bag, and you'll get charged for it too. We've finally got hipped to this a few years ago, and carry a canvas bag whenever we're out.
5. Alarm clocks - What's up with no alarm clocks in European hotels? We simply pack a travel alarm clock nowadays.

Cool T-Shirt Store

Check out VintageCotton.com. This one from Sean of the Dead is my favorite so far:




Also...we're heading off on our 12 day Berlin-Dresden Prague trip tomorrow, so postings may be infrequent for the next 2 weeks but we'll try to post some updates when we can.

Good News & Barker update

first the good news:

















Bob Barker update: I've been thinking of some replacement possibilities, along with how happy each would make me, from 0 - 100:

Seacrest 0 (no tanks!)
Tiki Barber 50 (he's got to do something after retirement, right?)
Andy Richter 80
Tom Bergeron (former host of Granite State Challenge!) 70
Magic Johnson (a longshot, but could be some good unintentional comedy) 75

Irene told me that the fix is in & that they've already picked out some cbs weather man - I hope not. I'll post some more thoughts on replacement possibilities later

Who wouldn't want this for Christmas?

Mr. Potato Head Darth Tater!

A Sad Day for All of Us

The day we all hoped would never arrive has just been announced:

Veteran TV host Barker to retire after 50 years

He's stepping down next June. He is 82, after all. He couldn't do it forever I guess. I'm not sure what else to say--just glad we have another eight months left. Maybe Irene and I can take a trip down there & see a taping in person, but tix will be impossible to get now.

I'm sure not looking forward to when seacrest or some other idiot takes over--No Tanks!


UPDATE from Simpsons/NFL Picks: Monty Burns went 9-3-2 this weekend. I went 4-10. (but he didn't have to pick against the spread)

A Stunner

Despite (because of?) my certainty that the NL champ would not win a World Series game(documented here), the Cards are a win away from shocking the Tigers, and the rest of us, and taking it 4-1. I've never seen a team have every lucky break go their way like the Cards did last night (the centerfielder slipped & fell down chasing what should have been an easy out, a key hit tipped off the leftfielder's outstretched glove, another killer error by a Detroit pitcher, etc,etc), and all without the benefit of even a single blown call, which is headline worthy by itself. Maybe it's just their time to win one. Now they'll blow it for sure.

Another stunner: For this whole NFL season, the Fox Sports web site has had different Simpsons characters picking the winners of each week's games. This week: Monty Burns. Next week: Kang & Kodos. How did I not hear about this until today? Not a clue.

Homer picked them in week one (and went 10-4-2). A sample of his wisdom: "I don't like Miami because the dolphin on the helmet is wearing a helmet that doesn't have a dolphin on it. Which side are you on, man?"

Queue it up

There are over 300 titles in our Netflix queue. I can't imagine ever getting this down to a reasonable number. Each year we add the movies that were nominated for the Oscar's Best Picture that we hadn't seen. As of today, Brokeback Mountain, Crash, and Walk the Line aren't even in our top 50.

Here's a glimpse of our queue, limited to our top 10 foreign language films.
An Amazing Couple
Floating Weeds
Schultzie Gets the Blues
The Blind Swordsman: Zatoichi
Monsieur Ibrahim
The Battle of Algiers
On The Run
The Barbarian Invasions
Jet Lag
Empire of the Wolves

Set your Tivo

Tonight is the premiere of the latest celebrity interviews for Iconoclasts on the Sundance Channel. Tonight Eddie Vedder interviews Laird Hamilton. This is the second season of this series with celebrities interviewing celebrities. Last season's highlights was Tom Ford interviewing Jeff Koons, Michael Stipe with Mario Batali, and Robert Redford with Paul Newman.

Fred's Latest Trick

I taught Fred a new trick. I don't have any video to show you but I came across a video of another cat doing exactly the same thing. Check it out!
'

Opening soon at a theater near you

Here's the first 4 minutes of the Borat movie.

It's My Birthday!

I'm sipping Bacardi like it's my birthday. And you know I don't give a f***. It's not your birthday! Oh, that 50 Cent can really write lyrics like no one else. Well, I'm not actually sipping Bacardi because there's none in the house. I am enjoying some rum that the Walshes donated before moving to Virginia. I raise my rum and coke to Keith and Julie and give thanks! And I'm watching/listening to my U2 Live in Sydney dvd that Denise (thanks Geeg) got me; Larry Mullen was looking pretty hot that year. Jim's treating me to dinner at the Met Grill. I hope they have strawberry shortcake because that's what I really want for my birthday cake.

Forbes' List of the World's Most Expensive Restaurant

Every year Forbes lists the world's most expensive restaurants. Aragawa, a steak house in Tokyo tops the list for the second year in a row. Dinner can be had at an average cost of $370 per person. Looking down the list, I saw the name of a restaurant where Jim and I actually had the liberty to enjoy a meal -- Queue de Cheval. Back in 2000, Jim and I made a trip up to Quebec and Montreal. We stumbled across this steak house in Montreal, and enjoyed lunch. I didn't realize this place was an institution. We would definitely recommend this place if you're ever in Montreal.

Crypted from Jim's Rant on Spezio

I'm posting this from Jim's email.

In case any of you haven't been following this--despite hitting a Cirillo-like .196 during his 2 years here (in Seattle) including a remarkable .064 (that's 3 for 47! - I looked it up) in 2005, Scott Spiezio has been killing the ball during the playoffs, hitting 2-out triples etc etc. Jack Buck said "Spiezio again!" after another big hit. This either proves that the NL really really sucks or that he was seriously tanking it when he was here with his buddy Bavasi. The answer's probably a combo of the two.

Spiezio has even turned into a folk hero in St Louis, like Johnny Damon was in 04 for the Sox, with fans are even wearing fake bright red soul patches to look like him (see attached photo at bottom). weirdo

OK I'll stop my rant now--just remember that I was the first one who told you that the tigers will sweep whoever comes out of the NL (sorry Keith)

I agree that the fad has gone to people's head.

Snakes on a Plane revisited

I know Jim (and Fridge) would appreciate that the USC marching band played the theme song from Snakes on a Plane during half-time. It's quite a catchy tune. Which version do you like -- USC's or Cobra Starship's?

I miss Buster

I across this and wanted to share. I totally love the show, Arrested Development, and I'm sad that it never got the viewership it deserved. I absolutely love Buster.

Irene's Reading List for September

The Red Notebook by Paul Auster
The Brooklyn Follies by Paul Auster
Istanbul, The Imperial City by John Freely
Little Green Men by Christopher Buckley
The Book of the Dead by Douglas Preston and Lincoln Child

I'M LAME

I haven't blogged in what seems like months - here's what's been happening:

I'm very happy to report that I finally finished reading Don Quixote about 2 weeks ago. It was L-O-N-G, and to me not all that great, to tell the truth. I'm sure it was cutting edge back in 1605 and an important step in the development of the modern novel, but it just kind of goes on and on, and there's not much of a story line carried through the whole thing, other than DQ being Craz-ee. And that whole windmill thing? Done & forgotten in the first 50 pages (of over 1000). I think it may be so well known because that's as far as a lot of people make it.

Much of Part2 (which originally came out in 1615, 10 yrs after part 1) is DQ & Sancho staying at the castle of a Duke & Duchess who play practical jokes on them for laughs, so I guess you could also say it may have important in the development of modern prank TV, like Candid Camera and Punk'd. I say read Les Miserables if you're looking for a brick-sized classic--that was great, a genuine page turner (really!).

Irene and I went to DC this past weekend to see Joe & Andrea. Had an awesome time, did a few museums, dinner with my Hoya buddies at the ginormous new downtown Clyde's and a crab feast at the Quarterdeck in Arlington with our newly relocated friends the no-longer Seattle Walshes, some boozing, a movie (Jackass #2!), saw Robbie Fulks live-- we were busy! We'll be going to Berlin, Dresden and Prague with J&A next month - can't wait for that!

to be continued tomorrow - gotta catch my bus

Lost is back

What's my opinion of the season premiere episode of Lost? I had high hopes, but I soon grew frustrated and annoyed by the show. What was with all the commercials? Luckily we fast forwarded through the commercials since we tivoed the episode. Book club for the Others?! Planet of the Apes thing with Sawyer?! The aquarium under which Jack is held captive?! Kate eating fish biscuits after sitting down with Henry for a meal of eggs, bacon, and coffee? Henry Gale aka Ben?! Eesh -- I hope the season gets better than this.

If you haven't seen ABC's Ugly Betty, you can still see the first episode online.

Guaranteed to put a smile on your face

Jagshemash

"Greetings!" as Borat Sagdiyev would say. Yesterday Borat, or rather Sacha Baron Cohen, held a press conference in front of the Kazahstan embassy in Washington, DC; it's hilarious. The Washington Post has some video footage. I only wish they included the footage of Borat running to the White House with reporters and cameras chasing after him.

The Terrible M's

Have you seen this mascot recently?

Last night we ended our 16-game season with the M's losing to the A's, 7-6. Of our group of 13, we were missing half of the crew -- the Walshes now live in Virginia, Phil is wandering around Europe with a munchy-red-eyed Rick Steves, and Matt's cavorting in the sun with Amy and hairy Greeks. Shout out to Mark, Pascal, Kris, Ben, and Shelly for showing up. The A's had clinched a spot in the playoffs the night before, so they didn't even have all their top players out there. We did end our season with a winning record of 14-2 13-3 as corrected by Jim; we really lucked out even with a losing team. Let's hope for a better season next year.

It's #%#$# o'clock in the morning

Guess who decided to show up an hour early to work today? Yup, yours truly got to work by 5:20AM. 5:20AM!!! Why, you ask? Somehow, I changed the time on my alarm clock so I got up earlier than I was supposed to. Actually, it was so early when I got up that I don't actually remember hearing my alarm go off. I wonder now if I just imagined it, or simply checked the clock (without my glasses) and thought it was time to get up. I didn't realize my mistake till I was already on the bus and notice that it wasn't 5AM yet. I thought my watch battery was dying and lost time. What an idiot I can be!!!

Of course, I'm going to blame all this on King County Metro. They recently changed the bus schedule, and I was completely caught unaware Monday morning when my usual 6:04AM #18 Express never showed up (it would take about 15 minutes to get to work). I had to take the local bus, so I was 15 minutes late getting to work. For some reason, King County Metro decided that people don't need any express buses leaving from Ballard till 6:30AM. I guess they think people who work before 7AM should suffer a mind-numbing, stop-at-every-freaking-bus-stop-between-Ballard-and-downtown bus ride.

Guerrilla Art

I haven't heard of a famous guerilla artist since Keith Haring. I remember taking the train around New York City, and seeing his drawings at various stations. I loved them then and still love them now.

I recently found out about another guerrilla artist, Banksy. He has sneaked his work into the British Museum, Tate Gallery, MOMA, the Met, and the Brooklyn Museum of Art. He recently had a show in Los Angeles. True to nature, the location of the 3-day exhibit was kept secret till hours before it opening. People weren't given the exact address, merely a street name; I'm sure people had to consult with the Thomas Guides to figure out where to go. BBC posted some photos of the LA show.


Banksy's definitely subversive and provocative, but I love his work. Thanks to Angelina Jolie for bringing him to my attention. No, she didn't call or email about the show in LA. I happened upon a story about her going to the show, and it peeked my curiosity.

YHHABOR!

For those not versed in pirate text messaging, YHHABOR stands for "yo ho ho and a bottom of rum"! Today happens to be Talk Like a Pirate Day! Coincidentally ABC's reality show Wife Swap premieres tonight featuring a "family" of pirates from Seattle.

Now that's a burger!

I had one of the best burgers EVER at the lovely home of Kris, Ben and KPJ. Luckily for us, Kris captured the offerings before they were devoured.

Jimmy, You're So Funny

Jim and I are probably the only people we know that watch Jimmy Kimmel Live. If you're ever up past midnight, you should definitely check out his show.

Better Known As...

Feeling particularly smart today? I came across questions from a local bar's trivia quiz. I asked Jim and Steve, two of the smartest guys I know and they were stumped on quite a few of these.

I'll provide the alternate name for something or something, and you'll have to come up with its more famous name. Highlight the space after the question to see the answer.

Charles Philip Arthur George Mountbatten-Windsor Charles, Prince of Wales
fluoxetine hydrochloride Prozac
Agnes Gonxha Bojaxhiu Mother Teresa
The Battle of Pittsburg Landing The Battle of Shiloh
Trimountaine Boston, MA
The Leather Girls and The Mankillers Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!
Roshambo Rock, Scissor, Paper
The Cynic’s Word Book The Devil's Dictionary
Shoeshine Boy Underdog
Elizabeth Short Black Dahlia

BBC headlines rule

The BBC sure has some talented headline writers - check out these fine examples, all from today's list of most read BBC stories:

Fresh surgery for 'mermaid' girl

Prince jailed for smuggling coke (this one's not about William, Harry or that Purple Rain guy our friend Robin likes so much)

Human heads dumped in Mexico bar

and my favorite of the day:
'Goat-free roads made me speed'

here's one of the goats that caused a Swiss driver to speed by not being in the road

Jimmy 101

No, I'm not teaching an intro course about myself, nor will I be releasing my own version of Depeche Mode's great live album. Nope. 101 is the score I posted yesterday at the West Seattle golf course. Since that represents my best score ever, you'd think I'd be bragging about it, but actually I'm going to complain instead. I had a 91 with one hole to play, only needing only an 8 to finish with a 99, and break 100 for the first time, but I CHOKED badly, carding a TEN(!), to finish with a 101.

oh well, if I played golf more often I'd have the right to be mad, I guess. or maybe the four 16 oz Coors had something to do with it? Don't blame me - they were only 2 bucks. Here I am lining one up like Ty Webb (photo courtesy of Phil Vandecar) and no that's not a putter.

BTW, yesterday was the farewell round of golf with my pal Keith Walsh, of the SeattleWalshes, soon to become the NorfolkWalshes, though I'm not sure if that means they'll be registering for a new URL. Bon Voyage Keith, Julie, & Jackson! Best of luck in Virginia!

Irene's Reading List for August

never drank the kool-aid by Touré
The Ethical Assassin by David Liss
The Big Oyster by Mark Kurlansky

Sox Lose! Sox Lose! Sox Lose!

Yes, it's true. Sadly, the Sox lost all 3 games my dad and I saw last weekend here in Seattle. Can you tell from this photo how things were going?

(Photo courtesy K.H. Chick Copyright 2006)

And look how ashamed Fred is after losing a bet to his kitty pal, Mariner fan Aunt Liza (aka KPJ):

More Monkey News! (sort of)

OK, so maybe this entry should really be called 'Laotian Rock Rat News', but this thing looks pretty much like a monkey, right?



And it looks a LOT like the Sumatran rat monkey that carried the zombie-causing virus in Peter Jackson's Dead Alive, which I've just found out is also known as Braindead.

See?


OK - maybe not an exact match, but still, it gave me an excuse to run this picture.

It's also the first movie I've ever seen that featured zombies doing it and a subsequent zombie baby, which runs around like a chucky doll after escaping from its barbed wire covered baby stroller (or pram since the movie takes place in New Zealand).

Please don't consider any of this a recommendation to see this movie.

Real Madrid v. DC United

Here are a couple photos I took of the Real Madrid - DC United game Irene and I went to a couple weeks back. Madrid scored first but DC tied it up less than 5 minutes later, and the 2 sides played to a 1-1 draw. Very lame of me to take almost 3 weeks to post these, I know, but, well, you know....

The man who would win any election in England.
Lucky for Prince Charles he can't be voted out.

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAALLLLL!!!!!!!!

Check out the huge crowd (66,000+) and they only announced the game 2 weeks before it was played.

What? There's a dress code!

If you're ever looking for a laugh or two, check out this blog, Go Fug Yourself. I love love love this site. It's way better than what you'll find in USWeekly, InTouch, People, National Enquirer, or Star. This picture of Britney Spears is a classic! Where does one start?

this headline made me laugh

Booty finally gets the call for Trojans

yeah it's real--about USC's new starting QB John David Booty, which is a funny name anyway. (Here's some Booty family trivia: John David's brother Josh was once drafted by our hometown Seattle Seahawks, and is married to one of Barker's Beauties.)

Here's my alternate suggestion for a headline--too obvious?

Trojans finally make Booty call

Here's another headline that got me to click-through:

Women players to get approved supplements

Turns out the article's about women tennis players now being allowed to take certain kinds of vitamins and nutritional supplements. As Homer Simpson would say: BORING!

Psycho Killer Raccoons

There is a pack of "crazy" raccoons in Olympia, WA that have killed 10 cats, attacked a small dog, and bitten a human being. WOW! Owners say they can hear when the raccoons attack, kill, and tear apart their cats. OH MY GOD! The neighbors are warned not to feed the raccoons. I personally don't like raccoons; they're simply large furry rats with fingers.

Who needs to watch Snakes On A Plane when you have "Raccoons on the Hunt."

what's worse?

I'm not going to talk much about this, but what part of this story has the most unfortunate wording: headline, sub-head, or the actual tale of woe it relates? (From today's Boston Globe).

Listen to me now & believe me later: I will comment no further regarding the events that occurred in Fenway Park over the past four days. So don't ask me!

Jeter's fister KO'd Papelbon
Yankee's blooper landed just right

By Amalie Benjamin, Globe Staff | August 21, 2006

It was the perfect moment, the perfect matchup. The rookie against the captain. The game on the line. Everything down to a single moment in the ninth.

With Melky Cabrera on third base after a double and wild pitch, Jonathan Papelbon had struck out Bernie Williams and Johnny Damon. And so, with two outs and a one-run lead, Derek Jeter stepped to the plate, hoping to continue the Yankee dominance in the most crushing way possible.

It wasn't a hard hit, not a home run or a smash. But it was just enough to tie the game, a soft liner that dropped a few feet in front of charging right fielder Gabe Kapler and brought in Cabrera with the Yankees' fifth run, setting the scene for Jason Giambi's game-winning smash one inning later in the 8-5 loss to New York last ni...blahblahblah...jeter sucks...giambi's on roids...arod sucks worse... blahblah blah... posada's a shithead ... blahblah

Jolie's Superbaby Revolution

My friend Aaron has come up with a theory about Angelina Jolie and her three babies of different races, including her latest with Brad Pitt.

He says she's from another planet, sent here to assemble a platoon of superbabies of different races, all coincidentally, and conveniently, unrelated by birth:

Maddox, born 2002, Cambodia
Zahara, born 2005, Ethiopia
Shiloh, born 2006, her first biological child, born in Namibia

The theory goes on to state that when the earth is no longer inhabitable (presumably in the somewhat near future, as these plans have been put into action already) the human race will need to be relocated to another planet. Not everyone will be lucky enough to make that trip, but Angelina and her superbabies will already be there, having been sent on ahead to populate our new world. Presumably, the money earned from Jolie's highly successful film and modeling career is being used to help pay for the spaceship/ark.

Personally this theory makes a little too much sense to me. To check it out I googled "Jolie Superbabies" and what did I find? Only that Angelina's 'earth dad' Jon Voight happened to star in a movie called "SuperBabies: Baby Geniuses 2" in 2004. More proof: have you ever looked closely at her 'brother'? He's weird--probably an alien too.

Planning their escape? You can bet there'll be room on the escape ships for Condi & Hillary too

Are all of these mere coincidences? I think not.

Do you think I'm kidding about all of this? I don't know--am I?

And Fred's Your Uncle

Here's a cute photo of the Martel boys. Before moving in with us, Fred lived with John and Julie in Oregon. These boys are their kids. They now live in Northern California.

Vogue's Pick of Top Dog

Vogue named the dandie dinmont terrier top dog of the summer. They're the rage in Europe, and they're quickly gaining popularity in the States. The fashionistas quip it's harder to get a dandie dinmont terrier than a Hermes Birkin bag (I'm assuming everyone has seen the episode of Sex in the City when the girls coveted the Birkin bag). I hate it when dogs become accessories. But how can you resist that adorable face?

Of course, this dog doesn't hold a candle to our favorite little dog, Bonzo.

Distressing thoughts of the day

from this NY Times Magazine Article:

Of the trillions and trillions of cells in a typical human body — at least 10 times as many cells in a single individual as there are stars in the Milky Way — only about 1 in 10 is human. The other 90 percent are microbial. These microbes — a term that encompasses all forms of microscopic organisms, including bacteria, fungi, protozoa and a form of life called archaea — exist everywhere. They are found in the ears, nose, mouth, vagina, anus, as well as every inch of skin, especially the armpits, the groin and between the toes. The vast majority are in the gut, which harbors 10 trillion to 100 trillion of them. “Microbes colonize our body surfaces from the moment of our birth,” Gordon said. “They are with us throughout our lives, and at the moment of our death they consume us.”

I don't know what's worse - that 90% microbial number or the closing quote. Thank you Dr. Gordon!

Don't Try This at Home

As all our readers are fans of Fred Martel, you all know how much this cat has cost Jim and me in blood, sweat and tears (but we still love him to death). He hasn't been himself since late last week, looking sad and lacking an appetite. The loss of appetite really had us worry since Fred usually scarfs his food within minutes of it hitting his bowl. You can keep time since he always give you a 15 minute warning before each of his daily feedings at 7:30am, 5pm and 11pm.

We tried new food (salmon and sweet pea, and turkducken) but to no avail. Rather than pay through the nose for an emergency vet visit, Jim dropped him off at vet this morning. Diagnosis: Fred's constipated. The little guy got an enema, and it did the trick. The vet said Fred's happily eating duck and peas to replenish his strength from the trauma.

I can't imagine how the treatment went but Jim found this website, http://www.catenema.com/cat1.html, that's hilarious. Poor poor Fred. Jim and I never considered doing this ourselves.

Three Decisions That'll Change Your Life

This past Sunday Jim and I were stuck in traffic at the border after spending Saturday night in Vancouver, BC. Props to Morty and Kate for planning a vacation in the Pacific Northwest! We had an awesome dinner at Cin Cin, an Italian restaurant that wouldn't be out of place if it was in Las Vegas. Back to my b*tching -- to past the time, Jim and I played this game where you name 3 people and the other person has to decide which of the three to marry, f*ck or kill. The best one I came up for Jim was Owen Wilson, Luke Wilson and Rainn Wilson (that's Dwight Schrute for those who watch The Office). Jim countered with Manny, Big Papi and Nomar. You'll have to take a guess which ones we chose.

You're On Notice

Here's the link to make your own notice board.

They're on the pitch

It's been a long week where I haven't been going to bed before midnight. To quote Sergeant Roger Murtaugh, "I'm too old for this sh**." Last night Jim and I went to the soccer match with Real Madrid v. DC United. It was a friendly game, and the score was 1-1 draw. Both teams had scored early in the first half, and they went into defensive mode for the rest of the game. Not too exciting but it was definitely fun. There were over 66,000 fans at the game; arguably the most diverse crowd I've ever seen at a professional sports event in Seattle. Phew -- there are poc's (people of color for those who didn't know) in Seattle.

I had a hard time finding pictures of the Real Madrid team. I guess they keep a tight leash on these things. I did find a photo of some of the players in Seattle walking along First Avenue. Do you think they just came out of the gun exchange or at the adult video store?

Irene's Reading List for July

Bait and Switch, The (Futile) Pursuit of the American Dream by Barbara Ehrenreich
Thank You For Smoking by Christopher Buckley
4th of July by James Patterson and Maxine Paetro

Carcassonne, France

This is today's Wikipedia* photo of the day - I just like the look of it:
(click on it to view it larger--it's worth it, trust me)

"Panorama of the fortified city of Carcassonne (Aude, France) and the Pont Vieux crossing the Aude River. The fortress of Carcassonne was considered impregnable and never conquered. It was begun by the Romans and built up through the years. It fell into disrepair, but was restored in the 19th century. It is now a UNESCO World Heritage Site."

*Bonus fact of the day: I love Wikipedia

Ranger Reed

here's my nephew Reed in his Park Ranger uniform he got on a family trip to Yellowstone:



Is that cute or what?

Monkey News: Da Return

I haven't found a good monkey news story for some time, until today that is. Here's a good one from msnbc that includes this classic quote: "There are too many monkeys" :

India Train Company Turns to Monkey Business

Fierce-looking primate employed to keep wayward monkeys off subways
MSNBC News Services

Updated: 7:02 a.m. PT Aug 2, 2006

NEW DELHI, India - They say it takes a thief to catch a thief, but India’s Delhi Metro has hired a monkey to frighten off other monkeys from boarding trains and upsetting passengers.

In an effort to keep monkeys out of the New Delhi subways, authorities have called in one of the few animals known to scare the creatures — a fierce-looking primate called the langur, the Hindustan Times newspaper reported Wednesday.

The decision to hire a langurwallah — a man who trains and controls the langurs — came after a monkey got into a metro car June 9, the newspaper reported.

In that incident, a monkey boarded a train at the underground Chawri Bazaar station and reportedly scared passengers by scowling at them for three stops. It then disembarked at Civil Lines station.

Passengers had to be moved to another car while staff chased the dexterous creature, causing delays.

The Delhi Metro Rail Corporation says it hopes the new hire will avert a repeat of that episode.

“It started working about a month ago and since then we’ve not had a single incident,” said Anuj Dayal, a metro spokesman.

The langur handler is being paid a retainer of India rupees 6,900 ($160) a month, and “he will be called whenever there is a monkey problem,” Dayal was quoted as saying.

“There are too many monkeys,” Dayal was quoted as saying.

Langur monkeys are similarly employed around the grounds of parliament and some government buildings in New Delhi.
© 2006 MSNBC Interactive

URL: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14121007/

PS: I borrowed "Da Return" in today's title from this classic album which you too can own for $.01

stuff I've been meaning to blog plus Prague potato chip scam

my stream of consciousness, larry king-style:

Mom & Reg are here this weekend. They arrived last night and will be here til tuesday 8/8. Going to Ms-TB Monday night with them and Geegy & Mike. Was mom's 65th bday on Monday 7/31 but I promised not to tease her about being an official senior citizen, so I won't. Fred the cat, this blog's namesake, became a teenager that same day, so happy birthday to mom & fred. Happy 13th anniversary to ML & Julie too. Irene & I are heading up to Vancouver tomorrow to see Morty & Kate. Mom & Reg decided to hang in Seattle rather than sit in the car another 6-7 hours, since they'll be driving off to CA Tuesday and did the FL-NH drive in the past couple weeks.

That's it for now except for this important warning from a frommers email newsletter I received today:

Potato Chip Scams

"Other than the taxi drivers, only one other thing upset me about Praha; When you sit down at a restaurant, you'll find potato chips in a basket. You'd think those stale potato chips -- and the unrequested bread they later bring to the table -- are on the house. But no! Whether you eat the chips and bread or not, they still charge you. It's just a few dollars, but you still feel like you've been taken. TIP: Ask the server to remove the potato chips before you sit down, and say "no thank you" to the bread."

I think my favorite part is how the author linked potato chips to the photo he took, you know, as a public service, just in case anyone was puzzled about how to avoid this scam because of unfamiliarity with what Czech bowls of chips might look like.

Wanderlust

Jim and I have been itching to hit the road again. We're trying to figure if and when we can go to Washington, DC and NYC before our bigger trip planned in November. It's still a coin toss if we're heading to Asia (Hong Kong and Shanghai) or Eastern Europe (Berlin, Dresden, and Prague). More on that later...

All this trip planning has given me an idea to list the places I want to visit in my lifetime. So here goes...

The Americas
Canada: Churchill
Peru: Macchu Picchu
Bolivia
Venezuela
Ecuador: Galapagos Island
Patagonia (Chile and Argentina)
Mexico: Mexico City

Europe
Scotland: Glasgow, Edinburgh
Spain: Madrid, Barcelona, Seville, Ronda
Portugal: Lisbon, Porto, The Algarve
Germany: Berlin, Cologne, Dresden
Czech Republic: Prague
Malta
Italy: Milan, Bolzano

Africa
South Africa: Johnannesburg
Kenya: Ngogrongoro Crater
Tanzania: Kilimnajaro

Asia
China: Hong Kong, Shanghai, Beijing
Japan: Tokyo, Mt. Fuji, Osaka
Vietnam: Ho Chi Minh City, Hanoi
Thailand: Bangkok, Chiang Mai
Cambodia: Angkor Watt
Malaysia: Singapore

Coco Damon?

Here's new Red Sox CF Coco Crisp doing his best impression of Johnny, aka Judas, aka Sell-Out, aka Dead-to-me, Damon, while the Sox were out here in Seattle. See the ball over on the right?

Bush: (with mouth full of bread) Yeah

That subject line is my favorite quote from this--another international highlight for America's face to the world, and true class act! I've never been more grateful to the Republicans for passing the 2-term limit after FDR. (Transcript courtesy of the BBC):

Bush: And thanks for the sweaters - I know you picked em out yourself...

Blair: Oh yes absolutely - in fact I knitted it!!!

(laughter)

Bush: What about Kofi Annan - he seems alright. I don't like his ceasefire plan. His attitude is basically ceasefire and everything sorts out.... But I think...

Blair: Yeah the only thing I think is really difficult is that we can't stop this without getting international presence agreed. I think what you guys have talked about which is the criticism of the (inaudible word). I am perfectly happy to try and see what the lie of the land is, but you need that done quickly because otherwise it will spiral.

Bush: Yeah I think Condi's (US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice) gonna go soon.

Blair: Well that's all that matters but if you... You see at least it gets it going.

Bush: I agree it's a process...I told her your offer too.

Blair: Well it's only if she needs the ground prepared as it were. If she goes out she HAS to succeed whereas I can just go and...

Bush: You see the irony is what they need to is get Syria to get Hezbollah to stop doing this shit and it's all over...

Blair: Dunno... Syria....

Bush: Why?

Blair: Because I think this is all part of the same thing...

Bush: (with mouth full of bread) Yeah

Blair: Look - what does he think? He thinks if Lebanon turns out fine. If you get a solution in Israel and Palestine. Iraq goes in the right way

Bush: Yeah - he's [indistinct]

Blair: Yeah.... He's had it. That's what all this is about - it's the same with Iran

Bush: I felt like telling Kofi to call, to get on the phone to Assad and make something happen.

Blair: Yeah

BUSH: [indistinct] blaming Israel and [indistinct] blaming the Lebanese government....

Warming up my TiVo

CBS has started promoting Amazing Race 10 which'll air this fall. The 13 teams started their 30-days globe trekking adventures from Gas Works Park here in Seattle back in May. CBS confirmed the teams traveled to China (the first pit stop), Mongolia, Vietnam, Kuwait and Madagascar. The Seattle P-I comments that this edition has more diverse racers than before, but I still wondered why they haven't casted many teams of mixed ethnicities yet. Let's hope for another exciting seaon, and no repeats of the lameness of the family edition.

I ♥ pomme frites

It's Bastille Day! The weather is gorgeous outside, with great weather for the coming days. To get things started right, I had lunch at Cafe Campagne in Pike Place Market. They set up food and drink stations so you just pick out what you want, find a seat, and enjoy!

Liberté! Égalité! Fraternité! Parté!

Here's to the French man of the moment, Zizou rocks!

Baby - it's what's for dinner

from today's Seattle P-I: "The $7.50 Burrito Grande at Gorditos in Seattle's Queen Anne neighborhood, billed as the burrito as big as a baby, is almost as big as this 11-week-old. You get a choice of meat in this double-tortilla-wrapped monstrosity."

I was going to make another baby meat joke here but decided to restrain myself

Zizou you've been a bad boy

come on, give us a hug

PC Load Letter! @#@##@!

From: "Boss"
Sent: Monday, July 03, 2006 7:43 AM
To: "Peon"
Subject: printer

Please put paper in my printer…. It is out

I'm sorry that I can't claim to be the peon requested to comply with this boss's command. But I have worked for this person before and I can attest that he makes similar requests all the time and he demands immediate attention whenever asked. The person requested to put paper in the printer doesn't sit closer to the printer than the boss. The peon just happens to be financially "closer" to the printer.

Sox Lose in 19

Apparently the Red Sox suck at 19 inning games. They lost another one tonight, blowing leads in the 9th with 2 outs (Papelbon with a rare blown save) and again in the 11th, this time a 2-run lead, when recently acquired ex-White Sox Jose Lopez and normally reliable Timlin couldn't shut the door. Only Timlin's 3rd bs of the year, so I ain't mad at him either

here are the gory details. Also, from the game recap: "It was Boston's longest game by innings since going 19 innings on Aug. 1, 2000, against Seattle"

Irene and I were at that game & stayed for all 19--It started Tuesday night & ended past 1AM Wednesday. Favorite moments: the Mariner Moose dressed in his PJs after 11:00, and the 14th inning stretch. Apparently we get a stretch every 7 innings according to the latest collective bargaining agreement.

Our old buddy Jeff Fassero surrendered a lead off HR to Mike Cameron leading off the 19th to end it. I think we were out of Safeco before Cammy touched home plate. After flopping with the Sox Fassero went on to become a closer(!) with the Cubs in '01 and is amazingly still pitching in the majors, with SF this year. He's been a strictly NL guy that whole time, providing more evidence to support my latest baseball theory: The NL Blows. Tune in to the All-Star game Tuesday night for more proof

OK I'll stop whining now - go Big Papi in Monday night's HR derby

Irene's Reading List for June

The Torment of Others by Val McDermid
fallen by David Maine
The Lost Painting by Jonathan Harr
A Million Nightingales by Susan Straight
The Wives of Bath by Wendy Holden
The Lincoln Lawyer by Michael Connelly

A little coffee with your drink

Welcome to Seattle where everyone, including their mother, loves coffee! My office building has three Starbucks, and there's always a line in any one of them no matter what time of day. This morning I really needed a caffeine fix so off I go to guess which Starbucks is the least crowded. Boy did I guess wrong! There were people ahead of me picking up coffee for their office -- Grande Vanilla Latte, Grande Chai Latte, Grande Latte with no foam and extra hot, Pomegranate Fruit Drink, etc... Not a single drip coffee or Americano in the bunch. It reminded me of the scene in L.A. Story when everyone at the restaurant ordered espresso but with something a little different from everyone else. I know anyone who's ever stood in line at Starbucks, Tully’s, Peets, {insert any corporate coffee monger}, you've already heard what you may think is the most pretentious coffee drink ever. After the 15th drink, I thought I was going to have a cow but luckily they exclaimed that they were done. They left Starbucks joking that they should bring a marker next time to put names on the drinks. Snarky assholes! They didn't even have apologized for making everyone wait for their coffee.

I love coffee like everyone else but I think people are getting out of hand with ordering specific coffee drinks. Starbucks is enabling people to become coffee assholes.

overheard at delaurenti's deli counter today

tourist wearing Buffalo Bills polo shirt, eyeing deli meat counter: Excuse me, do you have any blah-blah-blah (I didn't catch what he said) ham?

DeLaurenti's deli counter guy, blankly: No, what's that?

Bills fan: Wild Boar from Sicily or Corsica

Deli guy, even more blankly: no

Bills fan has nothing further to add to this, looks down & walks away.

Not sure why I even remember this kind of stuff or why it strikes me as funny, but I do and it does. I have my doubts the guy would have bought any, and that he was just trying to show off his advanced level of ham-sophistication, though he apparently forgot that kind of ham is illegal to import to the US.

I learned that when I was in Spain. See--I'm pretty ham-phisticated too! or maybe just ham-fisted? ham handed?

Next topic: here's another way ze Germans are celebrating the World Cup. First wild bear seen in Germany in 170+ years - QUICK - KILL IT!

Can there be anything cuter?

Jim and I had the pleasure to have Bonzo stay with us for the weekend. We stopped by Kris's house while on a walk. Bonzo just got groomed and Kris couldn't resist taking a few pics.

Record Breaking Ball

Who knew there was a world record for largest ball of rubber bands? There's a guy in Medford, Oregon who's hoping to break the current record holder, a 3,120 pound, 5 foot tall rubber band ball. Check out his MySpace page to donate to his cause. The ball is up to 563 pounds.

If you didn't know, I have my own rubber band ball which I started years ago. It's been so long (plus I'm bad with dates) that I don't remember when I started it. Check back later to see the size of my ball. It's no where near 3 foot tall but it does have a mean bounce and will leave a bruise if it's thrown at you.

Final TCB Vocab

I finished the Inner Circle almost 2 weeks ago but have been lax at blogging lately

Here are the final 2 words I learned from it (he used them in the same sentence):

senescence n

1. the organic process of growing older and showing the effects of increasing age [syn: aging, ageing]

2. the property characteristic of old age [syn: agedness]

climacteric n.

1. A period of life characterized by physiological and psychic change that marks the end of the reproductive capacity of women and terminates with the completion of menopause.
2. A corresponding period sometimes occurring in men that may be marked by a reduction in sexual activity, although fertility is retained.

Kitty-Cam

Here's a link to a National Geographic video short about cats and mice. They strap a camera onto a kitty, and set it out to go hunting mice. Spoiler alert -- don't read this if you don't want to know the outcome! Cat 1; Mouse 0.

I'm squeamish so it's pretty disturbing (though educational) for me.

Irene's Reading List for May

Saturday by Ian McEwan
Death of an Ordinary Man by Glen Duncan
Wicked, The Life and Times of the Wicked of the West by Gregory Maguire
Veronica by Mary Gaitskill
No Country For Old Men by Cormac McCarthy

Carl Everett update

Everett a model citizen in Seattle -- so far

My favorite quote from the article: "I haven't had problems anywhere -- except Boston," Everett said. "Really didn't have problems there. They had problems with me."

Not to sound too much like a HS yearbook quote or anything here, but...as Eddie Vedder sang on Riot Act's Cropduster:

I was the fool because I thought
I thought the world
Turns out the world thought me

It's about a guy realizing he's the one who's 'off', not the rest of the planet

the point here? I have no idea. I've always liked that lyric & Carl's quote made me think of it

Tragic Andrews Antacid and Red Sox News

So I bought these Andrews antacids when we were in Ireland a while back . The reason they caught my eye originally was this bit on the wrapper:

"Andrew antacid chewable tablets neutralise excess acid and provide fast, effective relief from acid indigestion, heartburn and trapped wind" (emphasis mine)

So how could I not buy them, right? Anyhoo - turns out they work really well, kind of fizzy, so it's a little like what sucking on an alka seltzer must be like (but more enjoyable. I think. I 've never actually done that.)

I only have half a roll left so figured I should look online to buy some more & I found this horribly distressing news. (under the image of the box)

So now I'm not sure what to do about my dilemma. Any ideas?

In other tragic news - for some reason the red sox (my team) literally are incapable of beating the blue jays this season (unless the recently demoted Josh Towers is pitching - they're 3-0 against him but something like 0-8 against the rest of the team). Not sure if I can do anything about that, but I sure do love to complain about it. And somehow they're still tied for first place, so go figure.

That's it for now--no TC Boyle vocab lesson today

TC Boyle Vocab Lesson #5

Don't worry--not too many more of these entries to come--I'll be done with "The Inner Circle" soon

allision, n. The act of dashing against, or striking upon.
"The boisterous allision of the sea." --Woodward.

bo·lus n. pl. bo·lus·es [Medieval Latin, from Greek, lump of earth.]

1. A round mass.
2. A round medicinal preparation, such as a large pill or tablet, that is usually of a soft consistency and not prepackaged.
3. A soft mass of chewed food within the mouth or alimentary canal.

Vocab #4

2 more from the Inner Circle:

ac·cip·i·ter,n. A hawk of the genus Accipiter, characterized by short wings and a long tail.


crenellation, n. The act of crenelating, or the state of being crenelated; an indentation or an embrasure. [Written also crenelation.]

Not much help so far, right? Fortunately there's more:

1: a rampart built around the top of a castle with regular gaps for firing arrows or guns [syn: battlement, crenelation] 2: the action of constructing rampparts with gaps for firing guns or arrows

I also like how they point out that crenelation is a synonym for crenellation

that's it for today

TCB Words #3; Monkey News #3

here are 2 more I came across today in TC Boyle's The Inner Circle

hor·rip·i·la·tion Function: noun
The bristling of the body hair, as from fear or cold; goose bumps


mast Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English mæst; akin to Old High German mast food, mast, and probably to Old English mete food
: nuts (as acorns) accumulated on the forest floor and often serving as food for animals (as hogs)

Obviously I already knew the word 'mast', just not this usage


AND.....as much as I hate to do it again so soon, I just found some more monkey news. ''Something very unusual happened," said David Reich, one of the report's authors and a geneticist at the Broad and Harvard Medical School.

yup I agree--very unusual. I think this is more than enough for one day--my plantars wart update will have to wait til another day.

Monkey News #2

This one's not as funny as the story about the drunk monkeys from last week: Dutch Monkey Trouble

warning: does not end well for the monkey.

On the bright side, we finally have an answer to that age old question of what would happen if a bear fought a monkey (old school amazon types will get that reference)

no new words today

but I'm finally ready to post something about my tooth implant procedure that was started last Friday. It kind of sucks - I have a screw in my lower left jaw that's going to be the root of the replacement tooth, which should be done in the next 3-4 months. We need to wait for the screw to graft into my jaw before slapping a crown on it so it'll look like a normal tooth.

Here's more than you ever wanted to know about dental implants, courtesy of the American Academy of Periodontology. One note: I think they meant to say "Aesthetic" under those lovely photos. One other note: is Periodontology a word?

Maybe tomorrow I'll post something about my ongoing plantars wart drama

As my dad told me a long time ago ( I think it was maybe when I turned 18): "Jim, it's hell getting old"

Pretty fly for a white guy

Tom Cruise drops by the set of BET to promote MI-3. I never get tired of this clip. I'm hoping Jim will pick up a few new moves from Tom.

TCB#2

only had to look up one word from TC Boyle today:

an·i·mad·ver·sion n.

1. Strong criticism.
2. A critical or censorious remark: “entertained serious animadversions concerning the U.S.S.R. and its behavior on the international scene” (Adam B. Ulam).

TC Boyle words #1

here are 2 words from TC Boyle's "The Inner Circle" I had to look up when I got to work today:

ar·ras n. pl. arras

1. A wall hanging; a tapestry.
2. A curtain or wall hanging, especially one of Flemish origin.

pe·lag·ic adj.

Of, relating to, or living in open oceans or seas rather than waters adjacent to land or inland waters: pelagic birds.

Damn that TC Boyle and his fancy words! more to come, I'm sure

Irene's Reading List for April

Superstud: How I Became a 24-Year-Old Virgin by Paul Feig
train by Pete Dexter
Wake Up, Sir! by Jonathan Ames

polargrizz entry #2

here's another link about the polargrizz I killed, with photo

OK it wasn't really me, some other joker named Jim Martell

Who Pays $45k to Hunt Polar Bears

Apparently there are a few nuts who's willing to pay lots of money to kill wild animals.

I came across a story in the Seattle Times about DNA testing verified the first grizzly-polar bear in the wild. The bear was killed by an American hunter on Banks Island in the Beaufort Sea. The hunting guide suspected it was hybrid and reported the kill to authorities who seized the carcass. Here's an excerpt:

Kuptana, a guide from Sachs Harbour in the Northwest Territories, was tracking with Idaho big-game hunter Jim Martell, who paid $45,450 for a license to hunt polar bears.

The DNA results were good news for the 65-year-old hunter, who was facing a possible $909 fine and up to a year in jail for shooting a grizzly. The Northwest Territories Environment and Natural Resources Department now intends to return the bear to Martell.

Martell told the newspaper he has dubbed the creature "polargrizz."

Of course, the coincidence of having the same name (albeit with an extra 'l') is pretty funny.

drunk monkeys

found this article today on the RSS news feed at the top of my gmail page. Apparently google thinks I'm interested in monkeys or drinking--either way they're right, as anyone who knows me could confirm. This is my first of what will hopefully be many posts of Monkey News (apologies to Karl Pilkington).

Nice win for the sox over that team I hate last night (and will not mention by name).
Let's hope for another couple wins tonight and tomorrow.

today's mariners quote o'day

"I'm puzzled," Guardado said. "I'm not going to go out there and strike the world out or anything, but I do get ground balls and I do get fly balls. These fly balls are just going over the fence. And at the time, I don't need them to go over the fence."

-Eddie Guardado last night after blowing his 3rd save in 7 chances this season. This time he gave up Pablo Ozuna's first career HR (in 334 career at bats) with 2 outs in the 9th.

I'm just wondering if there's ever a time when he does need them to go over the fence.

I shouldn't laugh too hard when the sox can't seem to be able to beat the jays at all this season

Weight Loss Challenge

I had a brilliant idea to compete with Jim to lose weight over the span of six weeks. We're very competitive, and thought this would be great thing to do together. I did trick Jim into this challenge. I had him say yes before telling him what he agreed to do. Ten pounds over 40+ days -- sounds like a breeze ; )

We both failed to reach our goals. I only managed to lose five pounds, while Jim maintained his weight. The upside to this challenge is it got us to gym on a regular basis. We were at the gym 3-4 days a week. I think we're going to keep challenging ourselves to lose weight. Now I have to work on the diet part. We haven't been watching what we've been eating, though we've been real good about not eating fast food.

I think I'm going to have Fred join us on our weight loss challenge for the next month. He's weighing a whopping 18.6 pounds.

Crazy Carl at it again

here's another memorable quote our new least favorite Mariner (thanks to Phil Vandecar for the heads up)

Carl Everett, signed from the White Sox last winter to add power, has three home runs in 22 games and is batting .232.

Is the lineup pressing?

"Pressing?" Everett said, scoffing. "We ain't doing nothing offensively -- not even pressing."

I remain in awe of CC's ability to sound overconfident while saying something so dumb. He doesn't approach his famous dinosaur quote here but still a fine effort.

eyepatch smoking guy

so I was on the way to the gym tonight (yes sometimes I go to the gym too) and I was nearing a corner & I saw a guy about my age wearing an eyepatch under his metal rimmed glasses. plus he was smoking a butt. Since he and I were both nearing the same corner, I made sure to stay on his good eyeball side so he wouldn't walk into me or burn me with his butt.

the end.

My Head Is Spinning

I've stepped up my workout and finally tried spinning at my gym. I was lucky enough to have the instructor help me adjust my bike before class started. A spin bike has more adjustable parts than the standard stationary bike. There were moments when I was sucking wind and thought I couldn't take it anymore. BTW, the instructor likes Smashing Pumpkins; that was the music of choice when we were doing the hard rides. It was a challenge, but I did enjoy it. The worse thing was the smell from the newly varnished floors in the racquetball courts. There were 4 four fans running in the class so it helped, but about 9 people left during the class complaining about the fumes. The instructor cut the class short and ended class after 45 minutes. The class was supposed to last 90 minutes. I don't think I could have made it for that long. Even a half hour after leaving the gym, I was still a little light-headed. A little toast and ginger ale seemed to help. I look forward to trying spin class again (but not for awhile till the fumes dissipate).

Irene's Reading List for March

1. Black Earth: A Journey Through Russia After The Fall by Andrew Meier


2. The Concrete Sea by John Dalton


3. A Place of Execution by Val McDermid


4. Stiff: The Curious Lives of Cadavers by Mary Roach


5. Nature Noir: A Park Ranger's Patrol in the Sierra by Jordan Fisher Smith


6. Heir to the Glimmering World by Cynthia Ozick


7. The Distant Echo by Val McDermid